Awesome!!
>
> >Here is a funny joke about an Indian boy on his first day at school in the
> >USA.
> >
> >It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar
> >Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade.
> >
> >The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History."
> >
> >Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?
> >
> >She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand
> >up: "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.
> >
> >"Very good!" Who said "Government of the People, by the People, for the
> >People, shall not perish from the Earth?"
> >
> >Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said
>
> >Chandrashekhar.
> >
> >The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.
> >Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more! about its history
> >than you do."
> >
> >She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,"
> >
> >"Who said that?" she demanded.
> >
> >Chandrashekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1862."
> >
> >At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."
> >
> >The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now, who said that?"
> >
> >Again, Chandrashekhar says, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister,
> >1991."
> >
> >Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"
> >
> >Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the
> >teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica ! Lewinsky, 1997!"
> >
> >Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say
> >anything else, I'll kill you."
> >
> >Chandrashekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to
> >Chandra Levy, 2001."
> >
> >The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the
> >floor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're f**ked!"
> >
> >And Chandrashekhar said quietly, "George Bush, Iraq,2005."
> >
>
>

hahahahaha Amazing LOL

This is pretty funny, I like it :)

YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2006 when...
>>>
>>>1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
>>>
>>>2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
>>>
>>>3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
>>>
>>>4. Youe-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
>>>
>>>5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is
>>>that they don't have e-mail addresses.
>>>
>>>6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see
>>>if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
>>>
>>>7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of
>>>the screen.
>>>
>>>8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, whichyou didn't have
>>>the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for
>>>panic and you turn around to go and get it.
>>>
>>>10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your
>>>coffee.
>>>
>>>11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
>>>
>>>12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
>>>
>>>13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward
>>>this message.
>>>
>>>14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
>>>
>>>15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9
>>>on this list.
>>>
>>>AND NOW UR LAUGHING at yourself.
>>>Go on, forward this to your friends... you know you want to!
>>
>>
>
>

Very good one.. I like it!

Check this out! hahaha
>>Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up
>>that
>>morning.
>>
>>I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would
>>be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday" and possibly
>>have a gift for me.
>>
>>
>>As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone
>>Happy Birthday".
>>
>>I thought... well, that's marriage for you, at least the kids
>>will remember.
>>
>>
>>My kids came into breakfast and didn't say a word.
>>
>>So, when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and
>>somewhat despondent.
>>
>>
>>As I walked into my office, my secretary, Jane, said
>>"Good morning, Boss. Happy birthday!".
>>
>>I felt a little better that a least someone had remembered.
>>
>>I worked until one o'clock, then, Jane knocked on my
>>door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside
>>and it's your birthday, so let's go out to lunch, just you and me."
>>
>>I said, "Thanks Jane. That's the greatest thing I've heard
>>all day. Let's go!"
>>
>>
>>We went to lunch, but we didn't go to where we normally
>>would go. We dined instead at a little place with a private
>>table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal
>>tremendously.
>>
>>On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, it's
>>such a beautiful day... we don't need to go back to the office
>>do we?"
>>
>>
>>I responded, "I guess not. What did you have in mind?"
>>
>>She said, "Let's go to my apartment."
>>
>>
>>After arriving at her apartment Jane turned to me and said
>>"Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the
>>bedroom for a moment. I'll be right back."
>>
>>"OK." I nervously replied.
>>
>>
>>She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes,
>>she came out carrying a huge birthday cake...
>>
>>Followed by my wife, kids, and a dozen of my friends and
>>co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".
>>
>>
>>And I just sat there...
>>
>>On the couch...
>>
>>
>>Naked.

This is pretty cool, wanted to shareee!

> >Did God create everything that exists? Does evil exist? Did God
> >create
> >evil?
> >
> >A University professor at a well known institution of higher
> >learning challenged his students with this question. "Did God create
> >everything that exists?"
> >A student bravely replied, "Yes he did!"
> >"God created everything?" The professor asked.
> >"Yes sir, he certainly did," the student replied.
> >
> >The professor answered, "If God created everything; then God created
> >evil. And, since evil exists, and according to the principal that
> >our works define who we are, then we can assume God is evil."
> >
> >The student became quiet and did not respond to the professor's
> >hypothetical definition.. The professor, quite pleased with himself,
> >boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the
> >Christian faith was a myth.
> >
> >Another student raised his hand and said, "May I ask you a question,
> >professor?"
> >"Of course", replied the professor.
> >The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?"
> >"What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never
> >been cold?"
> >
> >The other students snickered at the young man's question. The young
> >man >replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According to the laws of
> >physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat.
> >Everybody or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits
> >energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit
> >energy.
> >Absolute zero (-460 F) is the total absence of heat; and all matter
> >becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold
> >does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we
> >have no heat."
> >
> >The student continued, "Professor, does darkness exist?"
> >
> >The professor responded, "Of course it does."
> >
> >The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does
> >not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we
> >can study, but not darkness. In fact, we can use Newton's prism to break
> >white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of
> >each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break
> >into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a
> >certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't
> >this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe what happens
> >when there is no light present."
> >
> >Finally the young man asked the professor, "Sir, does evil exist?"
> >
> >Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course, as I have
> >already said. We see it everyday. It is in the daily examples of man's
> >inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence
> >everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but
> >evil.
> >
> >To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist, sir, or at least
> >it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is
> >just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe
> >the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what
> >happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's
> >like the cold that comes when there is no heat, or the darkness that
> >comes when there is no light."
> >
> >The professor sat down.
> >
> >The young man's name -- Albert Einstein
> >
> >A true story.

awesome!!!

HAHA, thats right, thats us!

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman
may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a
description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE !

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper
ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . . .. you may choose any
man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you
cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the
Husband Store to find a husband . .

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely
good looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good
looking and help with the housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead
gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign
reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this
floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to
please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the
building, and have a nice day!

Please send this to all men for a good laugh and to all the women who can
handle the truth!

good jokes

Lifecycle !!

sorry, lifecycle! he he



hope THIS 1 worksss!

> >Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"
> >
> >Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the
> >teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica ! Lewinsky, 1997!"

lol. its nice to read funny ones like this. nice way to time pass

> You have two choices in life:
> You can stay single and be somewhat sane,
> or get married and wish you were dead.
> ------------
> At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
> "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" "Yes, I am. I
> married the wrong man."
> ------------
> A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted"
> Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
> "You
> can have mine!"
> -------------
> When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let
> her keep him.
> --------------
> A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.
> -------------
> A little boy asked his father,
> "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
> Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying."
> ------------
> A young son asked, "Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man
> doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That happens in
> every country, son."
> ------------
> Then there was a woman who said,
> "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it
> was too late."
> --------------
> Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
> ---------------
> If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word
> you say -- talk in your sleep.
> ---------------
> Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking
> they had no faults at all.
> --------------
> First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
> Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
> -----------------
> A Woman's Prayer
> Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man , to love and to forgive
> him, and for Patience, for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for
> Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
> ----------------
> AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
> Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A
> blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find
> it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the
> bus.
> So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the
> husband
> gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it
> on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at
> the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."
> The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR
> stick, we'd be riding the bus ... so shut the hell up."

hehe!!

awesome joke , i love it.

Aznshawty, timro naam ke ho.. kun desh ko manche ho timi ?

launa ma nepal bata, nepali hu.. kina ke bhayo ra :S

Sabailai timi dhoti jasto lagyo re???

lagos na ta afulau thacha afu haina malai ke
CHECK IT OUT NOT UP LOL!~

It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list,

but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?


At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why

are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP

a report?

We call UP our friends and we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the

silver, we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the

house and some guys fix UP the old car.

At other times the little word has real special meaning. People stir UP

trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.

To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special And this UP is

confusing:A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.

We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night. We seem

to be pretty mixed UP about UP!

To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the

dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page

and can add UP to about thirty definitions .

If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP

is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may

wind UP with a hundred or more.

When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out

we say it's clearing UP. When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.

One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP, so.............
Time to shut UP!

Oh...one more thing: What is the first thing you do in the morning and the last

thing you do at night? ------- U P !!!

WAAAT HOW DID THE COLOR COME UP LIKE THAT?

HAHAHAHAHAH the 1st one is funny and the wife husband ones lol keep em comin