It was the last day of school; I was preparing to go home for one last time. I told him that I was going to London for a couple of days before going home. He sent me flowers, thinking that this was the last time we would talk on the phone. I did not know what to tell him? thank him for the flowers? and tell him what? I knew our relationship was going nowhere and I knew he did too. I had to break it off so that he would move on with his life ?.I thought this was the best I could have done.

His parents were pressuring him to get married as he was already on the threshold of thirties. He wanted to get married and asked me if he should buy me a ring and talk to my parents? I didn?t know what to tell him, I was excited and I wanted to say yes a thousand times. But little did he know that my parents had picked someone else for me and I was to get married soon. With a heavy heart and the dozen roses I left for London. Everyday the roses seemed to dry up and my hopes of marrying my prince charming weathered away. Nothing seemed to cheer me up? the square, the museums, river Thames, Madame Tussads. All I could think was did I do the right thing? I was drenched in the memories of our times in 5th Ave. The songs we sang together, the near by Thai restaurant, the flowers he used to bring me after work and how could I forget the day when I got locked out? the door was such. I should have known then the door once welcomed me would never allow me in forever. I wanted to call him and tell him that I was sorry that I messed up his life and that even if I wanted to I could never be his. I burned in the agony with the guilt of having a dual life.

To Be Continued

Please continue. Good one.

aww that sux :(...do u HAVE TO get married with the guy ur parents chose? cudnt u go with the guy u like... its not everyday u find someone u like and wanna marry.. and more than that, have that person want to marry u as well...

I dont have any memories to forget :D

Dimag bhaye ta Memories huncha ni Hahhaah Tilke..


No brain No Memoried to Remember implies nothing to forget..


LOL

Every soul I knew back home danced with joy, relatives were busy talking about how rich and responsible was my chosen husband. My grandmother specially seemed to be on 7th heaven, she told me with tearful eyes, you are the oldest in the family and I hope you keep our respect with your new family. I just gave her a lousy smile and ran back to my room holding my breath and my tears. Little did she know that her angel was not hers anymore. As the night fell, I lost my self to the memory lane, he had shown up half and hour late at the airport and forgot were he had parked. But he remembered my flowers and my kiss?. I blushed as I was mad and embarrassed. I was confused yet was anxious to know him. Oh, I remember how happy he was, he took me everywhere the first day as if he was going to run out of time. I told him to slow down, I said, ?Are you intending to finish showing me this beautiful city in one day?? He apologized and took me home. Sweet memories I said to my self and hugged my pillow and turned to sleep.

My mother was pounding on the maid?s door next morning urging her to start the morning chores while she was preparing for her pooja and bhajan. I thought to my self nothing has changed. Same way I had left it 3yrs ago. Mother was happy I was home and she wanted me to help her ? I gave in that morning hoping I would get some serenity in my life. That morning I prayed and I prayed hard hoping that he would forgive me one day and that I could live a guilt free life. Nothing was helping me to forget him, all I could think was what if I tell my parents that I have somebody else in my mind; that I can?t fulfill their wishes and I want to live my own life. I prayed for that courage. I summoned all my thoughts and went to my father who was reading kantipur daily is his chair with his eye glasses tucked on the tip of his nose. I laughed looking at him and he smiled ?. I thought ?hope this conversation will be easy?. I told him my plans without ruffling his feather. I told him that I wanted to finish my bachelors first and think about marrying this chosen guy later. He neither agreed nor disagreed with me, so I got up from the chair thinking now I have lost my battle, my hopes and my dreams of seeing my beloved one more time.

Jyoti jee,
yo "kramasa" ho ki.. "finito" ho?
Well...... regardless; it was nice. Was just curious if u are penning down some more of ur forgotten memories.
In anticipation
IndiaguiSE.:o

indisguise jee,
penning down for a while... kramasa lekhna nai birsechu.

spaceout ... haven't married yet... story sangai pachi banumla keke bhayo bhanera hai.

thanks for reading my dukh bhari kahani though ;)

Hmmmmmmmmm Dukh bhari kahaniiii
Well.. as long as one doesn't loose their mind.. therez always hope :)...
My presumption: Ur father agrees for ut further education, marriage gets postponed... and ur all happy and excited... Butttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt :(
the guy over there gets married to someone else...:(:(.....
Tell meh it aint so............................. well if it is... just to comfort ya... M not not married yet hehehe :p
In Jest Indisguise;)

Oh ya I got a memory. I think I was like 5 years old and I stole a baby from my neighbors house :D
hahaha damn I really miss doing that :( I was obessed with them and I didnt know what stealing was at all but it was damn great

haha dc ko dimag cha re :D
tyo implies bhanya k ho :D thul thula word haru alik bujhdina ma yeso simple ma lekhnu ni

Alik dimag chaina mero ani bujhdina :D

haha tilkumari, u stole a baby? r u a pedophile? damn i'm scared now!!

And why exactly ar eya scared USNEPCHICK.... as if she is gonna steal you.... DUh!!!!
Hmmmmmmm perhaps ur baby.... hmmmmmmmmmm... now i got it.
M sowwie... how old is S/he?.....
And yeah hehehehe, abt tilkumari being a pedophile... didnt she mention she was 5.... hahhaha how could u even...that too at 5....... hahahahha.. she herself was a baby.... lol....
damn ur mind.. lol....
Surprised,
IndisguiSE:p

Why is it that Tilkumari hijacked a good thread like this and started to talk about herself?

Keep writing Jyoti!!!

Indisguise : " and why exactly ar eya scared USNEPCHICK.... as if she is gonna steal you.... DUh!!!! "

Hehe u r just jealous that tilkumari doesnt wanna steal u......damn i feel special someone wants to steal me........good luck for next time indisguise.

Indisguise, I didn?t know the ending to my story was rather apparent. My sincere apologies, I could not make it suspenseful enough. Sadly you are right though, my father gives me the green signal and I come back to the States to find out he was married. But I did not write my story to get utter compassion but it was for a particular silent reader who visits here pretty often.
For all those who have read my stupid little story I would like to end it with a quote by Rose Walker: ?Have you even been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...
You give them a piece of you. They don't ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends" or "how very perceptive" turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.?


The end?

Hahaha? am jealous coz someone wants to steal you re,? lol.. damn ur funny?. I give u that much. And NAhhhhhhhhhh chick? don?t wish meh luck? who knows it might come true and you might want to steal me?. Heeheheh? wouldn?t be that bad? or would it?:p
I hope ur silent reader gets the message and hopefully by expressing your innermost feelings you did get some respite and peace. Sometimes in life we just have to let things be. I would like to quote one ohh so famous line? ? set love free.. if it comes to you, it is yours, if it doesn?t , it never was?? short and sweet?but well.. if only it was that easy. Phewwwwwwww??:(
And the brighter side?. Did I mention to you m not married either? hehehe? just reminding? lol? aiight Joyti jee.. take care?
Hmmmm? now what?
IndisGuise:o

Indi........i dont think that letting go of someone u love will actually prove his love for u mannnnn.....wat if he thinks u r ignoring him and u wanna be with someone else and leaves u forever? i wouldnt wanna leave the guy that i loved alone....would be calling him every second....haha seriously!! So u r lucky that u aint my boy.

jyotipradhan50

Here is a song from Amber Gurung.


Kamalo mutu bhanda dhungaa ko mutu jaatee
Eik din ta prahaar huncha....dhaal hunu parcha chaatee.....

Hmmmmmmmm... Yes you are right USANeptiChick.:p.. ops USANEPCHICK ehehhe..
On the serious, there is no one way or thing to do or follow in pursuit (if that?s possible) of love. Some might think love is Love is like pi - natural, irrational; others might beg to differ.
I was about to go on and on about it, but I suddenly realized that I was dwelling on something so infinite; the less you say about it, the better it is. I guess most of us find love in the most unusual of circumstances; we search for love all our life, and one day love finds us.
As someone rightly quoted, ?Love is a sign from the heavens that you are here for a reason.? Well? I guess its true, for what is life without love? ahhhhhhhh love.. Sweet love.
Zo0o00ommmmmmmmmmm>>>>?.. back to reality.. ehehhe? I guess that was a lil philosophical. Hmmmmmm hahaha.. nevermind?
Thinking...
IndisGuise:)
P.s: - ?So u r lucky that u aint my boy?
Well.. if u say so chick? :) but lemme know when ur a woman? I would consider being ur man.. I promise eheheh :p?

Indi......i am not a boy.......i thought u were a boy......damn maybe not........excuse me!