Dear Nepali Friends and Family,

I bought $5.00 phone card from Himtel to talk to my Family in XYZ, a city in eastern part of Nepal (Terai Region). I can not complaint about phone card. It was clear and smooth and got connection in just one attempt. Mom answered the phone with "Hello". I was so excited to hear her. "Namaskaar Mommy , Sanchai hoisincha???" that was my first sentence as always. And then conversation begins.

Today, I would feel it.. mom,s voice is different. Mom told me, "Babu! Ta Nepal nafarki aile". I was shocked. Is that a mom saying to her son? I could not believe it for a second. It has been three years I have not visited Nepal. I am so excited about this 2005 since I am planning to visit Nepal this summer. I wake up every morning and count the day and mark the calendar. Every week, I looked at the fliers and papers for sale. Almost every week I am going to mall back and forth and check list what I bought for whom??? I have a big big family and I don?t want to forget to buy something for them that?s why I have made the check list and I am marking the list after I buy something for them. Like ? Duiti vanji lai ramro ghadi ?Vanja lai Jacket? Bhai lai Guitar? Dijju lai make up kit?
Fupu dijju lai jutta ? rekha dijju lai Pearl ko necklace? santosh lai t shirt.. and blah blah blah?.. Simply I don?t want to disappoint anybody in the family. My friends were like? ?yaaar! You are going crazy. I have never seen anybody as much excited as you are. You started shopping even 6 month before you fly?. Anyway, lets drop it here and continue with the conversation with my mom. Mom said, ? Babu, Hijo raati maobaadi le gau ko ghar ma aago lagai diye? Mero vakkano futera aayo. Mom knew that I have a lot of sentiments attached to Gau ko Ghar. My childhood dream. I can even picture how many windows or doors were there. It was 3 stories huge building with a lot of space for me to play all around. That house is the best place to play Hide and Seek. I always visited Gau in every long holiday and I carry a lot of stories about it to tell my friends at school when I get back to school after holidays. Mom started explaining? "Ghar naramrari jaleko cha? pachi Aago dubai goth ma salkiye cha? Gai, Bhaisi sabai dadechana.. .. kunai kunai dadera ghaaite bhayeka chan?chatpataudai chan.. tara bachne aasha chaina re? dhaan sabai dadyo? yas paali gaaro cha hamilai ..". Ghar ko left side ma gai ko goth and right side ma bhaisi ko goth thiyo. People here used to ask me how is Nepal? And always replied them.. it?s a heaven on the lap of Himalayas. I told them about my childhood stories.. and they were expecting a new picture of mine with Bhaisi ma chareko pose.. that's what I told them.. that I would ride Bhaisi again who knows when I would be able to do it later in my life.. so I would take a snap of my buffalo ride. Socheko thiye paral ko thupro ma pani picture khichne chu? gau ko khola ma macha pani parchu?. Besides these, gau ko ghar ko ek ek kuna kapcha ko picture khichne chu? so that I could tell the stories to my children in future. I wanted to save that Ghar in my album like a story in the book. Dreams!! Ahh Dreams?. Aja mero mutu jaleko cha?. Gau ko tyo ghar ko jalajhalti yaad aai ra cha?. But I could only picture black colored all around the ghar now.

I was looking at the posting?"upload beautiful pics of Nepal here" and I was recalling my childhood.. my home? my gau.. my dreams? and suddenly this happened?

"ta hatar garera ticket na le aile? ticket line bela ma feri phone garera sodhnu" mom went on. I asked mom how is everything in the city. She said. " Gharma chuira (beaten rice.. ppl mostly use in terai for khaja) matrai cha bhane ghar bahira niskinu bhanda tei chuira ra paani khaanu thik cha?. Yasto awastha cha yaaha ko? Bus chaldaina? gari sabai thappa banda cha? Pasal khuldainon?. Sadak Sadak galli galli ma Yuddha bhaako jasto lagcha. .. Yuddha huda kasto isthiti huncha bhanera bujhnalai aba Iraq jaanu pardaina hamile" Then she added? "chora, yasto kura nagareko ramro phone ma? taile news thaha pai halchas ni?". Mom looked a bit scared with the fear that telephone talks would be recorded and used against. I just agreed to her sentence.

I am deeply hurt. Moists had brutally attacked on my sentiments last night. If I leave my sentiments aside then, mero ta ghar matrai jaleko ho? gai goru bhaisi matrai jaleko ho? asti ko 58 raaaga mare jasto tara? jasko ghar pariwaar le afno haat khutta or tauko gumayeka chana.. I don?t know how they will be able to forgive these Maoist (TERRORIST)? For me, its impossible? Killing is Killing? it?s a Crime from any angle I can see. I would not be able to ease my pain with any kind of justification for Killing. I would never be able to forgive those Maoists (Terrorists). I don?t care.. if its king or queen or girija or panche or makune?? if any of them will act to demolish this Terrorist group.. I would definitely support them.. no matter if they are prajatantrik or aprajatantrik.

Today I would like to honor this PICTURE again?.. The picture was dedicated to all Nepalese around the world on Feb 18 (democracy day). 11 Candles are burned in the memory of 11,000 nepalese being killed during the Maoist Andolan. And the 12th candle is the hope for peace . 12th candle represent my expectation to restore peace though King Gyanendra.

Also, I want to see the postings from those who have been victim of Maoist ... and.. if you think they can forgive this Terrorist Group (Maoist)? Plzz enlighten me? I don?t know if I am sick now?
Thank you very much for reading it.

Hey Meteors ,
I really feel sorry about everything...You are right about everything...
there is no doubt that the Maoists are Demons.
You made me think about my own house in eastern terai and my own gau ko ghar....
My parents have always been scared about all these things.

I support your thoughts.
Peace

Meteors,
Feel sorry for you and your family.....
..Hope you still forgive those maoists if they chose to give up violence....
...People, wake up..there is no need to have sympathy toward maoists ..they are so brutal............

i feel sorry for all who have suffered becaoz of the maobaids.they are just plain terrorists..coz of them we are going down and unless and until we kick them out i don't see anyway to save nepal..

First They Came for the Jews

First they came for the Jews
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.


Meteorsji,
Tapaiko ta gau ma tin tale ghar raichha sahar ma arko ghar raichha tapai america ma raichha tyo jaleko 2, 3 lakh 2, 3 mahina ma kamaihalnu hunchha ni. Tara jasko bhaeko euta matra ghar jaleko chha, jasko logne swasni bal bachha jaleko chhan tinko kasto haalat hola.
Ani arko kura, ghar jalekai karan le maobadi hune haru pani ta chhan ni hamro mulukma. Jalauna dherai sajilo chha -mattitel khanaera salai korde bhai halyo, arulai marna dherai sajilo chha- goli chalaide ya tarbar le ghati rete bhaigo. Tara Bananuna ra bachauna nikai gahro chha. Hami jasto ali ali dekhe bujheko manchhe le, we shouldn't incite hatred. I can understand your sorrow. Your family may not have directly acted against the maoist but even then they have done injustice to you. However see from every perspectives. See the family of the maoists killed by security persons, the family of security persons killed by maoists, both colours of the spectrum are concentrating hatred against one another. And this hatred has only fuelled the fire. No one can set fire in Narayan Hiti. No one can kill Prachanda and Baburam. Civilians have to suffer from the power struggle between Prachanda and Gyanendra. So it is not logical to encourage Gyanendra because it will ultimately cause repercussions against us.
Let us not encourage hatred and violence. The reason for the spread of Maoists violence is the big gulf between riches and poors. And that gulf is created by the semi-feudal society of ours. We can neither crush the maoists nor get rid of the King very soon. What we have to try is to create some sort of understanding between two sides, by dialogue, by compromise. Hami Nepali le aafulai parda matra dako chhodera rune, aru lai parda kaan thunne parampara tyagnu pardachha.

very well said, newuser. I feel sorry for you and your family, meteors.. but as newuser said, think of those who lost everything they had because of the brutality of maoists or the security forces.

Peace,
NK

Meteors,
My heartfelt sympathy/empathy for the loss incurred at the hands of ........

Euta kura, tapai le ago lagaune Maoist nai ho bhanera kasari bhannu huncha? Tapai ko ghar lai nai kina target gare?

Newuser :Tapaiko ta gau ma tin tale ghar raichha sahar ma arko ghar raichha tapai america ma raichha tyo jaleko 2, 3 lakh 2, 3 mahina ma kamaihalnu hunchha ni. Tara jasko bhaeko euta matra ghar jaleko chha, jasko logne swasni bal bachha jaleko chhan tinko kasto haalat hola.

Meteors: What a cheap comment Newuser? Mero tyo gau ko ghar ghush khayeko paisa le banako thiyena? tyo mero gretgrandpa le banako hoisinthiyo.. I can not believe you are the same person who came up with the idea of ?thinking impartial and sensibly?. See ?tyo jaleko 2,3 lakh 2,3 mahina ma kamai halcha? such a cheap ghatiya comment. Kura paiso ko hoina? tyo 2,3 lakh ko hos or 2,3 karor ko? I don?t care .. .thats much more than any monetary value to me.. that?s about my sentiments.. and don?t dare to measure my sentiments with whatever money you have in your pocket. I can not believe.. its you who is giving me the price of my sentiments. One more thing.. I should say I am lucky mero ta ghar matrai jaleko ho?.. mero buba ama lai iswor le bachaaye?.. things could have been worst?which I do not want to put into words? newuser jee hajur mero sentiments ko value 2,3 lakh rupaiya jo maile 2,3 mahina ma kamai halchu bhanne manche le jasko logne swasni bal baccha chan tinko sentiments ko pani value paisa ma rakhna sakcha? Tini haru ko sentiments bujhene prayash tapai bhanda bari ma garna sakchu. At least ma kasaiko sentiments ko value Rupaiya paisa ma lagaundina. Tesaile hajur le awaj charko nabanaaye huncha? mero sentiment ko value 2,3 lakh rupaiya ho bhanera malai ta bhannu bhayo? aru kunai nepali lai.. jetho chora maobaadi le maryo ta k bho.. kancho chora ktm ma doctor pardai cha? tannai paisa kamayera ..tapai harulai ktm mai bolai halcha ni.. bhanera nabhannu.. or auta choro ta maryo ? duita chora haru chadai chan.. pani nabhannu?
I am not advocating for king here? there could be anyone?s name who could act to eradicate maoist problem.. no matter its girija or maakune or surya bahadur.. I don?t care.

Paade queen? you are exactly there where Newuser is too. So you are too there to tell me the value of the property loss??? 2,3 laakh ho???

Nakkali kanchi! I said killing is killing..and there should not be any justification for this big crime. If maoist should stop the violence.. and come to the table for dialogue.. that would have been better.. otherwise? antiviolence against a violence is a violence too but there is no other choice.

Its up to you too take my story as man gadante story or spicy story to gain ur sympathy. I expressed exactly what I felt in the posting. You all are enlightened Nepali .. I don?t have any words to say. You have shown it in past too how to see truth.. and you have shown in the present too how to extract truth from falsified things? and you will show it in future too. And I would appreciate anybody else who come up front and tell me the value of my property.. Somebody tell me the value of my sentiments too?

peace

my sympathy to meteors and the others who are directly or indirectly been affected by the terrorism. it's a dark period in the country's history and it will eventually effect all our lives in one way or the other. however, dont get disheartened by the people who like to pass on cheap comments without realizing the seriousness of the issue. they did that in the past, they are doing it now and they will do the same in the future until they are directly affected.

it's easier to say "you are lucky to have a meal per day while there are people dying of hunger". but the truth is both are pitiable and nobody likes to be in either situation.

yes, i agree with Pastor Martin Niem?ller that we are suffering because we did not speak when the maoists were terrorizing while the corrupt politicians were looting the country. now we dont know what the king G is going to do.

i pray that all the moaists and corrupt leaders burn in hell!

Meteor,
NOOP! I am not so stone-hearted to tell anyone that hey u are in the US, so it doesn't matter whatever happens to your property back home, you can recompensate in jiffy. Think about the emotional trauma apart from the material aspect. What I wanted to say categorically was there might be enough proof that the arsonists are indeed maoists.

What I wanted to say categorically was there might be enough proof that the arsonists are indeed maoists

=


What I wanted to say was there might not be enough proof to categorically state that the arsonists are indeed maoists, at present.

meteors Jee,

I went through your story. I appreciate your creating capacity.
Though you are being failed to reflact why the Maoist attacks on civilian.

It would be much more realistic if you could mention,
"They send a letter to my Dad to deposit Rs. 50,000/- in their bank withinh 2 weeks. My Dad neglected it.
2nd time they send another letter asking for the same amonut with a warning of physical action against my Dad if he still refuse it to deposit the amount within next 7 days.
My Dad came to Ktm with my Mom and the house was cared by our NOKAR.
They came to the house and asked him who he was?
He replied he was our NOKAR.
They set fire mentioning our dad as Tanasahi for keeping NOKAR/KAMAIYA."

Yasari milaaunu parthyo k...
tara dherai ramro kathaa chha.
Keep it up!

Meteors,
I again whole-heartedly sympathise on you....Guys,don't compare sentimental feelings with material stuff...

..in your posting, i just felt uneasy when you stated..

""Namaskaar Mommy , Sanchai hoisincha???" "

....I don't think that in our culture we say 'namaskar' to our own parents....
..namaskar is for others...

..i hope u won't say that next time you talk to your parents..
show respect to them by saying other words...

anyway it's my advice..it's upto u to act...

ajsab!
nice to hear from you. i mostly stayed outside home and never said namaskar until a year ago. its been three years i have been staying in usa but left home when i was in 5th grade. Here, One day i went to Hindu Temple where a pujari told me the real meaning of namaste. Namaste is derived from a sanskrit word which means "The god inside me is saluting the god inside you" i never noticed this word such a powerful meaning before. I prayed god and definately i was doing Namate to god and it made some sense then... yea the god inside me is saluting the god inside that stone. i am not saluting the stone.. but the god inside the stone. In Nepali culture we say both Namaste and Namaskar. Its hard to find the differences between those two words... but practically what i have seen is that... Namaskar is the version of namaste that you greet somebody elder than you and the other person can reply you as Namaskar or maybe Namaste (since you will be younger). so its like if you are older than me.. and i greet you namaskar.. then ur reply would be namate (since i am younger than you) or you might say namaskar.
so i dont think namaskar would be something which is assigned to say others but not parents.... and yea i had not greeted my parents before that when i talked on phone.
i am curious.. how you greet ur parents... if you care to share...

Dear Meteors Jee,

Your writings are completely biased and one-sided. I do not know why you do not think from all sides. Your story is a recent one. I have many such stories which occured more than 25 years ago.

I was born on 1976 at a village of rural Solukhumbu district. I do not know till 1981 how I was able to grow in such a poor family. We had only a small house. In 1981, my father did suicide jumping from the hilly terrain near my house. I still remember I usually asked to my mother 'why do not we have any land?.. why the 'Jimmals', 'Mukhiyas' and 'Pradhan Panchas' have a lot of land ?'. My mother had told that we also had land. The land had captured by those 'Mukhiyas' and 'Pradhan Panchas' making fake 'tamasuks' and misuse of 'Political power'. I was really shocked listenning such things. But what could I do that time? My eledest sister was the slave to 'Mukhiya'. My eldest brother was the 'Hali' to the 'Pradhan Pancha'. None of my other family members got chance to study. I was the second last of 4 siblings of my parents. Knowing about the fake 'Tamasuk', I was very interested to go to school but we did not have school nearby. There was a primary school at 3 hours distance by walking. I was really in mood of revenge actions to those people but I was unable to go to school because I had to take care my younger sister who was born 3 months after my father died. My mother always had to work for those people and carry some food to eat. I can still remember those days when we (my sister and myself) were egarly waiting for mother to carry something to eat.

When my younger sister became 2 years old, I told my mother that I wanted to study. But my aims were failed becase our 'Ward Chief' was searching me to be his 'Bakra Gothalo'. My mother could not help me because she did not have anybody to complain. Then I started to be 'Bakhara Kothalo' at the age of 7. My Boss had 2 sons (Shyamu and Ramu). Both of them went to school. I had completely different foods and clothes than those guys. They usully did not let me even touch their belongings. But, I was gradually able to make a close relationships with Ramu who studied in Grade 1. I still remmber Ramu asked his father why 'Bhakte' was not going to study with us. Eventually, I was able to read his books when he slept during night. My daily routine were: Get up early and bring water 3 times from a spring 30 minutes far. Clean the utensils and go for 'Bakhrakothalo'. Bring 'Yek bhari Ghas' while returning from Jungle and clean utensils agian in the evening. When all slept, I had to read the Ramu's books duiring nights. My days changed significantly when I started to teach Ramu. One day Ramu's father asked me if I wanted to study. I replied yes in no time. Then he told me that I had to help for Ramu's study and do all works what I was doing at that time. He told that he will order to another servant to be 'bakharagothalo' in alternate days. After that I was able to go school in alternate days. I admited to Grade 1 at the age of 9. During my half-yearly exam, I topped the whole school and Headsir (Krisna Prasad) climbed me to grade 3. By this, I was 1 year senior to Ramu and same with Shyamu. I helped them for their studies. But I could not do the best in grade 3 and stood only class third. Shyamu became the first. However, I never became second from the next year. When I was at grade 5, there was a exam conducted by District Education office to select a student for 'Budhanislakhantha School in Kathmandu'. I did the best in exam and Syamu became second. By force and source, Headsir was not able to send me because of the political pressure. Shyamu was sent at last by Bhupal Kirati ( A influence Panchayeti hiro).

I had to go 5 hours far for highshool. Ramu did not continue his study. I requested Ramu's father to continue my study. Thanks god ! he released me as slave and I went to highshool. As in Ramu's house, I found a teacher's house and completed by SLC in 1994. My highschool days were better because I was in a teacher's house. Frankly speaking, I was able to eat fully how much I want during that time.

I did not know at that time why my father died. I even did not know why my sister was rejected from the 'Mukhiya'. I can never forget my mother's answers to these questions when I was young (Just before going to KTM for study) at 18. My mother said to me ''During the 'Janamat Sagraha', I voted againt Panchayet. I did not know that 'Pradhan Pancha' saw my vote. He was so angry with our family after that. Your eldest sister became pregnant at the age of 12 from 'Mukhiya'. She gave birth of premature baby. But 'Mukhiya' rejected to make your sister wife. We did not have any power. So your sister came to our house again. I am sure that your father did suicide due to your eldest sister condition".

... I want to leave my part after that because it is too long...........

In 1996, "Janayaddha" was started. In my village, Maoists contolled 'Raksi', 'Tas'. The next year, they looted Pradhan Pancha's 'Kodo' and distributed to the poor. In 1998, they killed that 'Mukhiya'. Everybody were happy. But, so-called security force entered our village and fired 8 homes including our in the search of Moists. After knowing all these, both of my eldest sister and bother entered to the 'Janamutisena'. I do not know now whether they are still alive or not? I only know that both of them were ok till last 'truce'. If our villagers vote now.. Maoists will get 98 % votes (except sons and daughters of thoise Mukhiyas, Pradhan Pancha and so on)

I called my mother and younger sister to Kathamndu. My younger sister is studying at Padhma Kanya Campus and I am paying their expenses from my scholarship. I am going to complete my PhD this year from USA.

Can anybody answer me these questions:
1. What should I do after my PhD?
2. To whom I support at present condition of Nepal?
3. Can I forget my past so easily just for the sake of 'Peace'?
4. Who is good or who is bad for me?

--------
OK

ok ji....nice to read your "eka desh ko katha"!!!!.....

Prakash Ojha is better than Mukhiya ba.
1. He sang good songs for us.
2. He did that "SAHAMATIMA" using his words.
3. He did nor make pregnant.
4. The girl was 17 much more mature than Ok bro's 12 years old sister.

So better to support Prakash Ojha. Just my 2 cents.

Meteors,
Sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through.
And newuser, a person's happiness and sadness are not relative. They are feelings. If someones killed both the parents of a person, and killed just the dad of the other, does that mean that the person whose monther is still alive should not feel sad but rather think of the one who lost both and feel luck, or even glad? And like Meteors said, his gaun ko ghar was worth more than just the monetary value it held. People like you don't seem to understand these kind of things. And OK, I do feel sorry for you, but how can you say Meteors, story is one sided? I am sure for those people who took away your land, and your rights, your story might just be one sided as well, as they have their own justifications. Anyway, this guy or girl just wanted to let his/her feelings out as he/she seems to have gotten badly hurt, and some people just don't care about that and start to advise why he/she should not be feeling that way. The bottom line is, he/she felt that way, and if you have nothing better to say, just for the sake of humanity, as a good human being, do not try to hurt others feelings.

meteors,
In our tradition,
we all bow down to our parents (sastang dandwat- khutta dhogne) if they are in front of you..Otherwise over phone, just start with talking about health or so so..
but never namaskar or namsate...........................

Meteors, why did they burn your building in the village? The Maoists, if they are Maoists, probably gave your family the reason. Tyesai ta aago lagaudaina thiyo hola. Not that I am saying your family has been involved in corruption, but is your father, uncle or grandfather politician by any chance?

Don't get offended, I am just curious.