I am rather into blogging!!.... This is just to keep promise I made to someone!!..:)
--Story of my life
Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
Cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company--
Well saw this hot girl in the TV next day and I was more daunted by the first few lines of the song than rather overexposed dancing of her!! The song was about not being unfaithful and It seems she was intending to make lots of people around unfaithful!!...Hmm quite a contrary!!
Anyways, I am not going to talk about that girl in this blog, rather I would like to talk about the right thing I would like to do in my life. Sometimes I just wonder if I know myself at all. I may have gulped Half a tanker of whiskies, few tankers of beer and lot more other alcohols just thinking that I will find myself then after, but instead somebody have to find me so that police won't find me and make me understand myself!..
Hmm
Conclusion 1: Alcohol doesn't help you find yourself, rather it gives a -once a jerk- always a jerk- impression to your friends.
Then there was a time when I tried meditation to find my self. They said I should concentrate for more than a hour seeing my breathes go in and out!! Strange it was, but doing that I would rather feel my brain wandering to the how it relates to finding myself; was I finding my soul or the tracks of the breathes to the lungs!!...made me wondered!! no offense to all the meditation addicts out there but concentrating on something for straight hour seems not my cup of tea. Yeah, I can concentrate on movies for hours and hours but there is constant change in the scenes and rather really beautiful creation world has made: the woman! But what is the attraction in seeing your own breathe going in and out, so I dropped the idea of discovering myself that way!
Conclusion 2: If you have to become Buddha just to find yourself out, Its better you have enough Media coverage as that Bomjan* boy so that u can also make some bucks out of it!!
*Bomjan boy- He is new-born Budhha back in Nepal, who vanishes from time to time and re appears again out of nowhere!! But I like his hairdo though!!
Then, I thought maybe my friends and family would know me better, so why not ask them: and I called my fried right away:
My friend- Hello!!
Me- Hey, its me!!
My friend- Hey, how have you been??
Me- yeah fine, But I need to ask you something!!
My friend- Ok!!
Me- Can you define me to me, because I need to find myself!!
My friend- Huh!! What does that mean!! (Maybe she was thinking; Duh what a dumbo!!)
Me- Hmm, lets say how u take me as??
My friend- as a friend, very good friend indeed, whom I can confide on anytime!! Hey did I told you about that thing!!
Me- Hmm, No I think..
Then...blah blah blah...
So the conversation was rather leading to I discovering my friend rather than my friend discovering me. I asked another friend too.. but conversation was rather short this time!
Me-Oyee, Tell me one thing!!
My friend- what??
Me-Can you define me??
My friend- Dictionary herna jaa afno defination khojna!!
Rather short and sweet; Maybe I should look into wikipedia or encylcopedia!! Maybe that would be better option!!
Now only another option was to turning into the family; and this time I did nto have to ask them at all!! My family tagged me as a lonesome, individualistic-cum-selfish, lazy-bum, anti-social creature. Hmm... But I needed to find me more than that!!
Conclusion 3-Don't ask your friends and family about yourself; they are more confused about you than yourself.
So now, I am here still finding ways to find myself; But still with 0 percent success!! Have exam lined up in next 3 days, but it seems that I am rather happy blogging!!
Final Conclusion
How can I find the right thing to do when I can't find myself out!! So I would like to leave that rather to my destiny!! Maybe destiny will also bring a princess of mine, who would draw her sword out and kill the dragon of lonely empire, and take me to the her kingdom, where I would live with all the children we ll have jumping off over my head trying to figure out who this -some make up-and ready for zoo- guy!! I would rather make others go insane trying to figure me out rather than making myself insane!!
P.S.-Did I make any sense out there?? If not I am sorry for wasting 15 minutes of your precious time!