What a read, thank you for posting it.

In my opinion, emotional cheating is as much cheating as physcially cheating. Emotionally and physically may not be equal but are in the same sphere. One might say, "He/she yells at me but does not hit me." Emotional abuse is as much abuse as physical abuse. One might argue that abuse is different from cheating. Looks like I am arguing both sides of the coin, haha. Feel free to disagree.

I think uranus ans sanee trying to give constructive criticism but I don't agree with their points.
First off, a little bit of cheesyness is warranted by the story. Homeyji's defense on Roshan's story is a clever (rahter sleek and cunning?) Move but is fully justified. Reminds me of the latest controversy with Vince Vaugn saying electric cars r gay in a movie and ppl (A Cooper) calling him homophob. Vince part scripted him to say that and that doesn't make the writer a homophobe.
Now as for cheating, this is a story, an art work. The writer has full right to term things as he sees it. While I think some level of cheating is involved, it still is not a full cheating; but the writer can call it what he wants and we can certainly debate it over.

Good story...not bad at all.

Stiffler,

You are speaking of a whole different dimension. I was not talking about storyline, I was merely pointing out minor descrepancies in sentence structures.

Uranus
Please read my comments again. I don't know how I am talking about "whole different dimension."
Let me help u out, my poiny is that the minor descrepancies are justified since a character in the story is expressing those sentence strucures. Is you have a character who is dyslexic and you write a dialogue for him you don't expect that dialogue to have perfect english do you? Doesn't mean the writer is dyslexic.
What's "whole diff dimension" about that?

Stiffler, agree with you here:

If you have a character who is dyslexic and you write a dialogue for him you don't expect that dialogue to have perfect english do you? Doesn't mean the writer is dyslexic.

The problem for me is: How do I present the protagonist's amateurish writing without the story as a whole looking like a poor work of writing?
Uranus is right, if it is just dialogue, then it is easy to "culturally translate" the experience here and there. But if it is a whole piece of writing, that is more tough.
This is my dillema. So maybe I don't have a choice but to polish the piece in italics up so that the story as a whole doesn't look poorly. Right?

I'd rather Roshan be viewed as a good writer (for a high school/college student) than my writing suffer because I tried to portray him accurately. I don't see any other way out.

Meera,

As far as the cheating issue is concerned, I think it comes down to 'from whose point of view?' From Sangita's (Roshan's wife) point of view, if she is anything like most Nepali women (or women in general for that matter) that I know, she wouldn't be thrilled knowing her husband was fantasizing his past flame while in bed with her. I think she would feel cheated. No?

Homeyji,
here I'm pointing out your previous post just above mine.
that's where exactly I'm glued. I'm analyzing the story from Roshan's point of view. I want to be lil' liberal here, at least he can imagine what he had wished for. But yes, Stiffler is cent percent correct. Writer has rights to present story whatever way he wants and that's the meditative one, that way writer does not care about readers. He even does not care whether readers will agree on his point or not. He just contemplate over his expression. Since I'm a lover, I would like to view from Roshan's point of view.

That is an interesting perspective Sanee. You feel that Roshan's priorities should be to his heart and not necessarily to the obligations that may come from his marital vows. That is certainly a view of a lover.

@ Homeyji,

@ Sanee: ok we got a nice plot from Homeyji, how about something from you?

@ Geology Tiger,

If I had been such an energetic author then I would have already published dozen of novels series wise -- like Coelho :D
Lazy person like me can only enjoy reading others work and venture posting comments.
To be an honest, I'd love to read similar prolonged critic comments beneath my post ;)

omgawd ! much ado over a simple sweet story :)))

Loved reading the Cheater ! : D

I think I agree to Homeyji's perspective. Just because you are not performing adultery does not mean you are not a cheater. In a relationship, cheating is when one party deceives the other or acts in such a way that constitutes infidelity.

You just cant make love to your wife - eyes shut - thinking about the girl you hooked up(loved) while in High School. That is messed up.