APPROACHES
From the school of Optimism
-Learn to turn the problems into challenges and then opportunities
(eg: "Waste is not a problem but a resource"]
From the school of Cynicism
-Who cares? Jun Jogi aye pani kan chireko!
From the school of Peace & Love
-Organise a series of 'Miss Peace' Beauty contest with Nepathya as the ambassadors of peace, Declare Nepal, school, and people's bedrooms a Zone of Peace and light peace candles every fortnight from now on
From the school of Diversity Lottery
-Call for a referendum to see if people want Nepal to become the 52nd state of the
USA (Puerto Rico being the 51st). Once the referendum passes, lobby George Bush to dispatch h's trigger happy army to smoke out the corrupt and the rebels. Employment for Nepalis in the cities of America. Trade sovereignty for Amercan Dream. You can't eat sovereignty can you?
From the school of Division of Labor (Also 'Cowboy and Indian')
-Experiential tourism for tourists: they can choose either of two categories: state supporters ('cowboys') or Maoist sympathisers ('indians'). Let them take sides and fight each other out in Kalapatthar, Upper Mustang, Dolpa - in all the pretty places of Nepal - with guns supplied by India, US, Belgium and smuggled from China. The objective: to live to tell the tale on US TV networks - Oprah Winfrey, Larry King Live etc. Or create something like the teleseries on 'Survivors'. Convince the Khetan Group to underwrite the teleseries.
From the Lions have eaten the Lambs school
-Let Social Darwinism work, and let's hope that down the road Nepal will truly become the country of the 'fittest' or 'supermen/women", and no more of sycophants and bootlickers.
From the School of Extinction (which follows from the Lions and Lambs school)
-Those who do not survive social darwinism, create a Memorial and museum for them.
And charge the tourists through the nose to see what they missed seeing by a whisker.
The museum will have sections on the Janjatis, Dalits, Adivashis. Bring in the National Geographic...with beautiful Kathmandu expats working as curators.
From the school of Geopolitics
-Let India and China fight it our for possession of Nepal - the way India and Pakistan have been fighting over Kashmir.
From the school of Foreign Aid:
-Send a May Day to the G8, multilateral and bilateral agencies. "See the mess this country is in? Send in more money through hundis and money transfer companies. We will be more transparent, more accountable and more inclusive from next time. We promise."
From the school of Dylan:
-Sophia Loren, Bridgit Bardot - and the country will grow. (Just like their breasts.)
Just like a woman.
From the school of Buddhism
-World Buddhist Summit with Dalai Lama and Ani Chhoying delivering keynote speeches . If not, then sing 'Om Mani Padme huh', so that it reverberates from Mechi to Mahakali and touches each and every soul.
From the school of Hinduism
-Conduct a Mahayagya. Bring in Sai Baba,bring Guru Ravi Shankar, Mahesh Yogi, Shiva Sena, Manohar Joshi...make Chardam pilgrimmage compulsory for all Nepalis - so that all lives are transformed.
Have I missed anything?
-Karmapa
