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 Some Jokes..
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Posted on 04-23-07 6:38 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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>>BOY : May I hold your hand?
>>GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
>>
>>GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
>>BOY : You love me...
>>
>>GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
>>BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
>>
>>GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
>>BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple
>>
>>GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
>>BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
>>
>>BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
>>GIRL : How soon??
>>
>>BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
>>GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
>>
>>SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
>>TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his
>>mouth.
>>
>>MAN : You remind me of the sea.
>>WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
>>MAN : NO, because you make me sick .
>>
>>WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out
>>of the other.
>>HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and
>>comes out of the mouth.
>>
>>MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
>>Peter?
>>PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
>>
>>1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
>>Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".
>>
>>2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
>>Pupil : "The moon".
>>Teacher : "Why?"
>>Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the
>>sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
>>
>>3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
>>people are no longer interested?"
>>Pupil : "A teacher".
>>
>>4) Waiter :- Would you like to Have BLACK COFFEE..
>>
>>COUSTOMER : "What other colors do you have?"
>>
>>5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was
>>called current affairs.
>>
>>6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
>>Sam : "It's a family tradition".
>>Teacher : "What do you mean?"
>>Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a
>>teacher".
>>Teacher : "What about your mother?"
>>Sam : "She's a woman".
>>
>>7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've
>>failed?"
>>David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's
>>performance repeated" .
>>
>>8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and
>>stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
>>Student : "Brotherly love".
>>
>>9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
>>eating?"
>>Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
>>
>>10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
>>Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out
>>of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case
>>I've treated. The others all died".
>>
>>11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
>>One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same
>>day and at the same time."
>>
>>12) Teacher : " George Washington no! t only chopped down his
>>father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
>>Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
>>One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."
 
Posted on 04-23-07 6:40 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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hese are the latest jokes, SMSes and forwards that are doing the rounds. The topic? Of course Indian skipper Sourav Ganguly.

Read on, and whether you agree or disagree, laugh on!

Q. What's Dada's favorite English movie?
A. Gone in 60 Seconds

Q.What’s Dada's favorite Hindi movie?
A. Aa Aab laut chalen

Q. What’s Dada's favorite song?
A. Ek pal ka jeena, phir to hai jana

Q. What’s Dada's favourite food?
A. Maggie (is done by the time he’s back from the crease, bas 2 minutes!)

Q. What did Dada say when he was asked, 'Why is it always necessary to wear protection (helmet)?"
A. "OTherwise, Two minutes of fun can ruin your life"

Q. Dada teaching kids ABC...
A A for Awkward bounce, B for Bowled, C for caught, D for Dismissed...

Q. What is the similarity between 100 m race and Dada's innings?
A. Both take same time to complete, about 10 seconds.

Q. Easiest way to get Dada out?
A. Just bowl to him — He will get out anyway.

Q. How does Dada score a century in cricket?
A. By bowling 10 overs, he will give away 100 runs.

Q. Which is the best team in the world?
A. India — plays with 10 people (Dada can’t bat, bowl or field) and still wins sometimes.

Q. What should Dada do after retirement?
A. Become catching coach, he offers the best catch practice in international cricket.

Q. Why did Dada decide to donate his bat?
A. He doesn't use it anyway.

Q. Who can beat Dada's record of 2 minutes at the crease?
A. Dada himself, if he can improve his running speed.

Q.If Rahul is "The Wall", what is Ganguly?
A. The hole in the wall

Q. What is the height of optimism?
A. Ganguly putting on sunscreen.

Q. What's the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Ganguly?
A. The walk back to the pavilion.
 
Posted on 04-23-07 6:43 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Lol nice ones. Wot dissings. Lawl. ;D
 
Posted on 04-23-07 9:12 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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convert that from ganguly to sachin or sehwag...I guess Ganguly is in good form nowadays!
 
Posted on 04-25-07 7:39 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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If U have more please write............................. I enjoy with these.

Any way thanks
 
Posted on 04-25-07 11:14 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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A man who was driving a car with his wife was stopped by a police officer. The following exchange took place.

The man says, "What's the problem, officer?"

Officer: "You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone."

Man: "No sir, I was going 65."

Wife: "Oh, Harry. You were going 80." (The man gave his wife a dirty look.)

Officer: "I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken taillight. "

Man: "Broken taillight? I didn't know about a broken taillight!"

Wife: "Oh Harry, you've known about that taillight for weeks." (The man gave his wife another dirty look.)

Officer: "I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt."

Man: "Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car."

Wife: "Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt."

The man turned to his wife and yelled, "SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"

The officer turned to the woman and asked, "Ma'am, does your husband talk to you this way all the time?"

The wife said, "No, only when he's drunk."
 


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